Signs Of A Soulmate Connection

Signs Of A Soulmate Connection
Success & Abundance Quiz

Video Transcript

good morning good evening good afternoon everybody out there and podcast land you are in tune to another episode of intrinsic motivation from a homies perspective this is Hamza and I am David and we’re going to keep with the theme our last podcast we had spoken with a gentleman talking about not all men are dogs and it was a great podcast because it was right before Valentine’s Day and everybody had their church suits on what have you and the guests that we have today she’s going to talk about attracting your fairytale love and this could happen even after Valentine’s Day so it’s going against popular opinion that the world is going to end if you don’t have your fairytale love after Valentine’s Day she is a children’s author she has written many books I’m excited speaking with her because in the Buddhist tradition and other traditions around the world you are actually reaching enlightenment and higher realms of thinking when you think like a child so maybe we can throw some of the logic out and go back into our child mentality at least for this hour I’d like to welcome from Las Vegas we have Rosie pava to the podcast welcome Rosie thank you I’m excited to be here and talking to you yeah thank you for having yeah thanks for making it and I’m actually glad that you’re alive to talk to us because many people fall off the planet earth if they don’t find our fairytale love for Valentine’s Day oh there that will be safe after hearing the stock so yeah I am alive and everyone else will be fine yeah promise what we talked a little before the podcast came on why do you think there’s so much energy centered around Valentine’s Day well it’s only natural because everybody is looking for their soulmate and there were naturally need and once love in our life so it’s very natural for people to to want to have a partner to celebrate with but to me it’s not just but that one day you know all the hype and all de commercializing of the holiday is not really necessary because it’s too much pressure and people get depressed over it but they don’t realize that matters of the heart not it should be commercial at all you know and it’s not just for one day it’s for the whole year for your whole life so don’t just hang on that one day ya think the other side of it that I experienced fortunately or unfortunately is I’ll get calls from other people after Valentine’s Day because they weren’t really happy with the gifts they receive from their current boyfriend and I’m like well how do I take that that is so conditional and that you may not be my fairy tale of after all oh ok based on my gift that’s not a very good you know perspective because if you’re expecting something of course you just set up yourself for disappointment very easily it’s never going to be perfect if I have to be perfect and that’s not what’s important because yeah a guy picking a gift you know right there there’s just you know assault and that so that’s but it’s not about the gift and should be hmm you are saying some earth-shattering stuff right there Rosie I don’t know you might the girls may take your girl card yeah it’s nice it’s a nice gesture and it’s it’s fine but but yeah there is something much deeper than you should be looking for awesome awesome thank you for that and so let’s get into it so you know at the introduction and I was talking about you being a children’s author and and some spiritual traditions you have to start out as a child because once you throw the logic in you’re you’re actually taking some of your spirituality out and so I wanted to know a little bit about your background and what led you into the children’s author category yes I’m originally from Bulgaria I grew up there and I emigrated to North America and as an adult in 1998 I’ve always been fan of writing and I love stories storytelling so that was that was there my lawful writing has always been there but and I’ve written lots of poetry and essays short stories you name it as a child and um but then my I revisited my love for writing after having my first child my first daughter and reading children’s books to her so I just started writing my own and from there it was just meant to be I can I couldn’t get away with any more and have many books published and keep doing that I love it I enjoy it it’s my passion and I love encouraging kids today to also follow their passions and dream big because I came from this communist country with such unsupportive environments where you were constantly being socially judged about everything put down constantly and condemned for your aspirations and my home life as well it was difficult and unsupportive and I just want to encourage everybody everybody that no matter where you come from or what family you’ve been raised in you can still decide who you want to be and follow your dreams and passions so that is my movie today I love it have you seen the movie mr. Church with Eddie Murphy I my heart I don’t recall it’s really interesting because as I was talking earlier spiritually or being like a child you’re kind of open and you have a sense of wonder and I was getting the itch to watch mr. Church and I was like why you know Eddie Murphy is usually funny but it’s kind of like a drum dramas type movie so I watched it the other day and I just realized it was for this conversation right now and that he was supposed to take care of this woman for like six months she was she had cancer and she had a little girl and what happened the the woman wanted living like five years later and then he wound up becoming just a family staple for the rest of their that child’s life and that children because that child became an author afterwards because he always talked about the importance of reading and rereading if you read a book and you loved it then it’s okay to read it like five or six times and at the end she wanted to becoming an author and she was talking about how big of an influence that he was to her and his life and you were saying that you know in the media family he may not have had it but who was in your immediate circle that allows you to explore your childlike wonder yes yes whoa my grandparents actually unlike my parents my grandparents read stories to me I never I don’t remember actually my mom or dad ever reading to me or telling me a story but my grandparents did especially my grandfather fairytales mostly and it was magical to me staying at their place and listening to their stories and my grandmother also she was telling me stories from her childhood on the Bible and it was it was my escape and even daydreaming or music that’s what kept me going and that that was really my escape I wholeheartedly agree with you but my favorite guy in the whole world rest in peace is migrant was my grandfather it was just so many times that as a child I was able you know to listen to him from stories but as a teenager you know running like what do I do with girls and stuff even though my dad was around and was more so my grandfather and luckily I was in my mid to late 30s before he transitioned how are your grandparents still alive or if not how did you able to spend time with them well I was in my teenage years yes and now I don’t have any living grandparents because both of my parents are the third child and so they were you know at a dance age but now I don’t have and unfortunately I don’t have them anymore well rest of these to your grandparents and it sounds like they are very instrumental in making me the well-rounded woman that you are today yes yes I love them and I really enjoyed my time with them I’m so happy that I have those memories as a child with them I even dedicated a book to them and it’s about grandparents and a special bond that gets shared with them so it’s really special to me so close in the wall school quick so growing up in Bulgaria you know you said that even when you’re young you had a love for words and stories and reading this is that what you knew when you were a child that you wanted to be an author and their writer or did you have something you just enjoyed and you wanted to be something else so is that what you wanted to be well I wanted to be a journalist that’s what I remember I just loved analyzing telling stories and just being playing with words that was my strength in school that was my thing I’ve always loved it so yeah remember wanting to be a journalist in Bulgaria shedding some light on some you know obscure advance or or the truth you know exposing the truth or something like that but yeah so it was definitely writing in my in my dreams mm-hmm okay yeah you said that you came in came to the United States in 1998 and so you were exposed to some of the journalism in Bulgaria what’s the difference between journalism there versus here oh yeah I’ve been away for so long now for 21 years and them it’s I’m imagining yeah it’s changed a lot I know that but how much I can’t even at this time because it was a communist country most of my life I lived there and then when the democracy came and all of a sudden it became very chaotic and all that freedom people didn’t know what to do with it and it kind of went to an extreme where it became sort of ugly so I don’t know what how things are going now hopefully better but there’s yeah very very many differences and and the way people handle the journalism oh no worries I mean this is about Valentine’s Day and finding your true love and fairytales and we don’t have to delve into the real world at least for this hour that’s right so let me hike to being a child you have written a book if I work with you and usually for children ages 3 to 6 what was that book about well that book it’s about safety and security of reassurance of safety and security and mothers love and yeah it’s very special to me because it’s kind of came from both my experiences as a child where I was longing for safety and security and I’ve been love and reassurance and the time when I became a mom and my experience with my own children officially the first one I was one of those overprotective moms wouldn’t let my friends hold my baby and I was obsessed with safety and I just you know the love was so big and so overwhelming but I have three kids now and so I just I’m just glad that book is out absolutely oh I wanted to bring it up because you were talking about safety and security and we were joking a little bit about gifts and usually guys think about you know the bigger the gift that shows the bigger my affection or attention towards you that’s not always the case and it seems like the underlying theme that most women want is the safety and security not necessarily the gift behind it exactly yes gifts come and go and you might not remember it laughter well but the bigger picture is what you’re looking for and don’t just hang on the little things that are you know superficial things you just you need the deep connections that’s what you’re looking for so you’re absolutely right nice there’s a friend of mine as each guy Russell also he transition different was Brae and he was from New Jersey and his his real life was just like the the TV show with Ray Romano roaring it aired right his parents his wife had the same name as the person on the show and his parents lived right across the street so he would come in all the time or like is that your life ray and he’s like yeah it’s totally my life and it was hilarious right until one month we met what that comes to mind for this conversation was you know they had I think three kids together and one time she his wife was just really out of sorts let’s say and she’s like what’s wrong with wrong baby but she said look I just want to be alone right now and so he was like okay so he took the three kids out for ice-cream and you know they were gone for a couple hours and he came back and she was pissed at him they was like what you said you wanted to be alone she was like no what I meant was I just went alone time with you you totally misconstrued what I was talking about it right that’s always life where we have these mixed communications but overall it is communication so what’s a better way to communicate with your partner oh yes communication that’s key don’t expect you sometimes we expect our partners to read our minds and and just know what we want would you say the opposite of what we want you know trying to test them maybe in some way but don’t do that you that’s tricky and you sort of yourself up for disappointment just speak your knees speak your expectations and have a honest discussion no tricks involved because nobody wins if you’re trying to trick the other person just open communication sincere and that’s key so you know what’s expected that would be my my take on that but yet communication is key in every type of relationship business personal anything so yeah no games there is a trick so I’m a little confused because most women would say that is a test so is it one of the same oh well because not really really you might not realize that I’m not saying that you’re doing that on purpose you know but it’s it’s tricky for the guy to understand a woman’s language if it’s not you know honest and direct and you thinking oh I’m you know you might want tests or or you don’t feel like saying what you really want but you want them to guess you need so in that way it could be tricky you know it’s not that you’re doing it on purpose that’s not what I meant you know but yeah open communication play with you here so thanks for playing along yeah well I can go both ways so sure dyes are innocent guys you know do tricks and all that other stuff so I’ll throw the guys under the bus for this podcast it’s okay [Laughter] that one thing that I did find in looking at your background was when you’re talking about fairy tales you are talking about making a commitment to believe in your fairy tale so what how do you create a fairy tale as an adult and how do you make a commitment to see that that fairy tale is manifested yes so as kids of course we used to believe in fairy death something as we grow up we we think it’s silly and we shouldn’t do it anymore but in fact the opposite is right because everything is a fairy tale everything that we’re thinking before it’s manifested is sort of a fairy tale it’s a story that is not real even in science you know all that innovations and technology invented it first it was a course it was an idea and a story that you’re telling yourself and it doesn’t exist but because it’s science you tend to believe it and work toward achieving it to where when it’s the matters of the heart you think it’s silly and you shouldn’t believe it because it’s just a fairy tale but that you know that’s the play of the law of attraction also when you believe that you have that vibration that energy and you are attracting it you’re attracting what you believe in what you think about so if you focus on the lack of your soulmate and your loan and use that and that’s what you attract not knowing it and you think if you’re looking for the soulmate but we’re not ready because you’re not vibrating with that same energy in order to find so if that is the kind of fairy tale you need to create focus on what you want what you’re looking for what you’re expecting what gets excited what gets you positive to set yourself in that positive mindset you can create board that there’s different ways to do that you can meditate and but once you start thinking positive thoughts and what you want then you’re attracting that so in that sense create your fairy tale think about what you want and believe it think it until you believe it you know you can’t make too big of a jump if you’re depressed and you know in despair but little steps you know something positive and with time you get there and start believing it and then we’ll start happening you’ll see the signs so and it could benefit could go many different ways so don’t get discouraged the main thing is to get in that positive state of mind and from there to pay attention to your instincts and impulses and don’t try to rationalize or overanalyze just just go with it and Maggie for example let’s say you just finished folding laundry on a Sunday night and you meditate you practice your affirmations and you’re feeling pretty positive and hopeful so you’re browsing your Facebook Timeline and maybe hoping something or someone of interest will pop up and all of a sudden you’re craving Ben & Jerry’s ice cream so hmmm how strange you might be thinking you know but now before you start telling yourself you’re too tired to to go or talk yourself out of going off of ice cream just get up and go it in so but let’s say on your way there you’re driving and you get a flat tire and I understand that the old you might get upset about it but and the new you might be tempted to say really universe I trusted you interested by instinct and this is what I get but hold off the blame for a moment because so let’s say you’ve leaning against your car in the dark trying to decide which a call to help you out with the flat tire and then a white Lexus pulls over and out comes a drop-dead gorgeous man your perfect type just go with me stay with me here and he wants to help you change the flat side and you grin and get all giddy but then out the passenger door is gorgeous why steps out and again you’re seriously you starting to doubt this law of attraction thing and suspect us playing games with you now the good couple helps you with your car trouble and you know turns out they’re just missionaries and felt the need to give you a hand and um you really do appreciate the gesture but you still can’t figure out what the whole ice-cream craving was about and by the time to dry off to Ben and Jerry’s it’s already closed so you decide to just swing by the new your old greens and get a bottle of wine call it a night and maybe you’re thinking you misunderstood the whispers from the universe on but you’re walking the aisle trying to pick a bottle red wine and a voice behind you says may I recommend the 14 hands Merlot it’s really good and it goes pretty much with everything even ice cream and you turn around and there’s this charismatic that’s smiling at you holding up a bucket of ice cream and no wedding ring on his finger and you finally know what the whole ice cream thing was about and you smile and say thank you thank you universe and but how it might play out so you never know just pay attention to the fine that sounds like an excellent TV show of the Rosie Povich Show episode just an example and my happen you know you never know but yeah so that was my fairy tale for that was my chose a fairy tale for you [Laughter] so yeah question right yeah how long will it take before you knew that your husband was my soul mate I’m not long at all that long and that long yeah yeah so and we’ve been married for 21 years now with three kids so you know I must have been right or something if I were to ask him the same question what do you say the same thing I mean was a kind of a simultaneous she both kind of just knew would you could you repeat that I didn’t hear though if you if I were to ask him that same question wouldn’t say the same thing I’m maybe hot I can’t speak for him but he must have known – yep I think Celsius so it makes me also think of I want to talk about sabotage because you’re talking about before that wonderful story that people are tired of being lonely on Valentine’s Day and so they’re missing some of those whispers or misinterpreting some of those whispers and one of my favorite shows on Netflix is the good place are you familiar with that show oh no I’m not okay it’s a problem I I just watch a lot of Netflix apparently while ago uh well in the show the lady dies and you know she thinks he’s in heaven but she’s really not so you know if a lot of tongue-in-cheek about the good place at war she’s torturing herself and in one scenario when you die they put you with your soul mate and so she’s with this guy and he totally does not look like what she imagined to beat her soul mate and then you know through a couple of episodes they’re like wow we really are soul mates and she was like this is what I wanted from wanted my whole life right and so when she realized that’s what she really wanted she started to sabotage the relationship so what happens with the law of attraction when you get those whispers the universe gives you what you want then you’re like oh my goodness is it really what I wanted I didn’t really want it or I wanted it my own way not the way to universe set it out for me yes I will you must have had that vibration going on somewhere on a deeper level without realizing because you are constantly having a vibration whether you realize it a lot and it might be a negative one you might think what you need and it doesn’t have to be you can’t you don’t say it with words necessarily and you still have that vibration so you might be thinking just because you’re saying the words this is what I want that this is the vibration you’re offering but that might not be the case so you get what you’re attracted and there must be something going on some false belief that you’re having about relationships and you need to work on that change your perspective or be really clear on what you want and you can’t hear those whispers if you’re in a negative state of mind you have to be in a positive state of mind so if just ask stop and ask yourself how am I feeling right now and if you hear something when you’re angry or upset or depressed that’s not the right course where you want to follow you have to be in a positive state of mind so that’s that part you need to pay attention to the whispers are come from from overwhelming emotions are not the right ones to follow I love it so another another fairytale that most girls love as children is Snow White and with Snow White one of the famous lines is mirror mirror on the wall right and so would you also say for wealth attraction that everyone’s a mirror of the vibration that you’re putting out and so you should actually be thankful right if you’re putting out a negative vibration at someone it returns that to you that’s actually showing you a real time what you’re putting out and you can make plans to adjust that vibration or attend a nightly okay yes yes that is a very good question and that is the point your your emotion as your guidance system so you will know if you if you’re feeling negative you must address that and do something about it refocus your attention to something that feels good that feels positive to you it doesn’t have to be on the exact same subject you’re looking for improvement it could be Orman something entirely different though the point is to raise your vibration and you can do it so many ways you know they’re your environment is offering plenty of things to like there are many things that you dislike but just don’t focus on them just focus on the things that you like in order to raise your vibration you write you this is your mirror this is your your system is telling you if you’re in the right state of mind or the wrong one and and what to do from there all that the contrast that is offered and I do use a lot of Abraham’s words because that’s what I listen and read to and jaring Esther’s peeps but yeah they say there’s nothing wrong with the with the contrast because it helps you determine what you actually want and what you don’t want so you can focus on the things you want but what we do is because we receive the things that we don’t want and we focus on that we just fix it on that and and start you know complaining why is it that way why I don’t have it instead of looking for what I would like to have and how I’d like it to be and that’s you’re focusing on the positive instead oh yeah we’re big fans of Abraham as well and so that’s why I was bringing up that mirror mirror because you know the other side of that coin is someone may be rude to you but that’s not necessarily what you’re putting out it’s something that they’re dealing with and it has nothing to do to do with you mhm yes right and when you are thinking of the partner you want to let’s say are you ready for that party can you know can you attract that partner because if you’re in your negative state of mind you cannot attract someone positive if you want them to be trustworthy and bring you security and think you probably and be positive and be cheerful and you know helpful and all those qualities do you are you offering the same for vibrations so that you can meet that guy you’re probably not and if you’re offering something you’re desperate or you’re you’re depressed and you attract from like that and then you don’t like them you know if it’s someone like backgrounds fear in your life and you don’t like them you don’t watch out with that guy who has no money and it’s not secure and it’s not loving and and thoughtful you don’t want anyone like that right so if you’re not offering the right vibration you will not be able to attract a person yet another fairy tale song is row row row your boat right and so the ends of the song they talk about life is but a dream and since you’re a fan of Abraham you know Esther says even though Jerry transitioned it’s still with that fairytale love even today because since life is just a dream he’s still in her life throughout the day and she can tell if she’s feeling low he’s not around when her vibrations are up it’ll be around so he’s still a barometer to help her shape her vibration mm-hmm yes yes the dream has to be with a positive vibration just saying the words or you know looking at the board he can you can if you’re not feeling it it’s there’s no point so yeah make sure you adjust your dreams away and don’t go too far as to where you don’t you create that kind of fairytale that it’s so abstract to you that you there’s nowhere you can do leave it you know that that doesn’t work either it’s kind of sabotaging yourself because you wouldn’t believe it so don’t go too far just take it one step at a time and and focus on the positive there’s another song and they start mentioning songs but I’m trying to think of and I know it well but I’m trying to think of if you if you believe something in a fairy tale you can take the future even if you fail so if that’s what it’s what it’s all about if you do believe the fairy tale you know it doesn’t matter if you fail because you know that that’s that’s just temporary and you keep believing it until it manifests yeah what do you know the name of that song I’m not familiar with that one oh it’s um it’s in the lyrics it’s not the actual on name of the song but it’s from Mamma Mia too near we came to sing in it I just want to come up with the right lyrics right now but it might come to me I just yeah you’ve never heard it you have you watched Mamma Mia – no I’m missing out a life apparently what’s a good song so I can tell you that yeah so the other thing that I would think about is soul mates and so kind of going back to row row row your boat life is just a dream sometimes that soul mate could be that person that’s giving you so much contrast so while you’re in 3rd dimension you probably hate that person but when you transition you find that that was your soul mate and y’all had a contract to give you that contrast so you can raise your vibration so it’s not always straightforward yes that is correct and and it’s um I know sometimes we get frustrated without partners for something and we think okay well it’s not perfect so maybe that’s not the soulmate I was looking for but it’s it’s plays a role and you’re right if there’s the good things and not-so-good things that help us raise our own vibration and and grow so it’s very necessary I realize how much I’ve changed throughout my marriage and and that’s exactly what talking about I’ve changed and I’ve become better because of it because of that contrast and in many ways so I actually appreciate and when you look at it that way you start appreciating it and then you actually attracting more positive things for yourself so it’s a good way to look at it always look at the contrast as something positive because it is helping you it’s there no reason it’s helping you yeah let’s stay there for a second Rosie because when we talk about a fairy tale or the the premise of a fairy tale and Hollywood and movies you meet your mate and then the credits roll like they never show what happens when the craft after the credits roll you think yeah but even even before you meet like once you meet them nothing is perfect right off the bat right there is those obstacles and there’s those challenges and there’s you have to overcome to be you know to match with that person and then it’s not perfect and then yes you’re right after the you know the happily ever after is not shown my favorite growing up I had a record vinyl record of Cinderella thou was my favorite we didn’t have lots of children’s books at that time but we did have fairy tales and I have that on them a record I was played over and over and over I knew that fairy tale by heart it was my favorite and you know it is just you know they were off the gold bear and of course she got the prince but we’ll have an act did they never argue never had email disagreements and he was never disrespectful lots of that about it alright so that’s a fairy tale is it yeah becomes we like the contrast I like that because it reminds me of a good friend of mine he was married to his wife for 19 years it may never argued for 19 years right and so one day he had come work and he was distraught you know he had to leave work early and all and you know we’re like what’s wrong he’s like my wife just left me and so at the end she was like well you never raise your voice I never saw my passion we never argued like she felt that there needed to be the contract and he was probably a little bit too much of a people pleaser so much you might say he was a pushover I mean he gave her everything that she wanted but he thought that’s what she wanted in the end she left them because of it mm-hmm see yeah that’s that’s how I could play out and you don’t want to break your marriage so if and you think on the surface you know it’s a very positive thing they don’t argue but it must have built building up inside her and something was not right so yeah the contrast is is bringing growth which is absolutely needed you cannot stay in the same state in the same position that you were when you got married so of course you’re going to evolve and and that requires contrast once you get to the next level there’s no contrast to deal with in order to get to the next level because we’re constantly moving life is not still so there’s no way things are the same so that’s probably what it was I’m guessing can you give us an example of contrast I’m sure when you first got married you probably thought life would be so much better if my husband would just put the toilet seat down there was more to it so can you give us an example of a contrast that help you grow oh oh so many things we’re very different I’m I was by nature I’m an introvert and he’s very social he’s very positive anything is possible nothing stands in my way whatever eyes that do and I always I used to be you know that way sort of negative you know just looking for always finding the ways were why it wouldn’t happen and kind of a yeah so he probably too to see that it’s something crazy impossible even if if he says he might if he’s mind to it and it says it’s going to happen and I said there’s no way that’s going to happen and it does oh well no one likes really so it started to grow in me that in fact that’s how I should look at life and and try to find how to accomplish things instead of trying to find why they wouldn’t happen but yeah talking about that’s what is if you would just stop drinking from the bottle how about the juice from the bottle or stuff like that that’s you know it hasn’t changed but you just you just go with it yeah yeah so some things don’t change but you grow and start to accept it and look at it differently so it’s just it’s just always compromising and it’s um yeah it depends on how you take the contrast you can take it in a positive way and thank you for that you said you had three children are they all girls or they’re a boy in the mix yeah yeah I have two girls and a boy the third one is a boy okay perfect so there’s there’s four of us and there were three girls of meeting right and I’m a twin sister and there was obviously a difference between the way even though we were under the same roof we’re for certain things they approach things differently for me versus girls in the family do you guys look at it the same way or everyone’s pretty much getting the same message are you asking about my approach as a parent yeah just thinking like where I’m thinking from from a fairy tale love right when you when you open it meet someone you find out well this is what I learned I learned that you don’t really know someone until you spend the holidays with them all right and so when you see the holidays you see that archetype of how they were raised and so you another story that I’ve always learned was you don’t know oh I stole women you don’t really know a guy unless you see how he treats his mother so guys and girls look at each other differently and so when you’re attracting your fairy tale over there certain things you should look for that you may and your kids may be too young but it’s like or they’re in high school and just beginning like these are the things you should look for or this is just fairy tale of and you really need to focus on maybe your career or something versus your boy you may say well no you should focus on your career and then love will come afterwards I’m just wondering if there are different messages that you’re given to your boy versus your two girls um no not really and I don’t think this should be different so that I should really try to control what they do with their lives too I can give advice but they have their own guidance and their own emotional system to give them the tools they need so as a mom I can it’s very delicate I’ve started to understand because we think that as parents we have to just just pave the way for them and tell them what’s right what’s wrong and what they need to do exactly the way you we think because of our own experience my kids have a very different experience growing up in North America and you know the way I grew up in Bulgaria so I my experience is not relevant at all as a child as a teenager so I can give them advice and I can you know share my opinion but I don’t want to control them in a way that I say well this is the first and this is the second and this is the third and this is exactly how you do it I don’t think that’s healthy parenting so I wouldn’t I wouldn’t say anything different to my boy I just because he’s a boy compared to the girls I would look at their personality and approach that depending on their personality not their gender you know so and they have different interests they have different personalities they respond differently to things so it wouldn’t be one you know approach fits all with them regardless of whether it’s my girl or my boy so that’s how I look at it that’s a really good point it makes sense you’re Abraham fan it makes me think of a story where a mother and F Abraham a question she was like it gets trying to control she say my husband he can’t need anybody Abraham seen since a body his way and then Abraham was like well look at the energy that he’s putting out now if he as someone was in his life they’d both be dysfunctional to be a terrible relationship like why would you that now oh did you talk talk a little bit about the difference between being lonely or being alone is there a difference yes a very big difference being lonely being alone I like being alone as like I said as an introvert and as a writer I need a long time I crave it really badly I actually get drained and in big crowds and lots of people and then I have to recharge for a long time so for me yeah being lonely is that we’re being alone I’m sorry is a necessity I just need the quiet time and to be with my thoughts and to write and create and all that but but I don’t feel lonely at all I feel you know very comfortable being being alone but lonely is when you actually really don’t have that comfort in your in your heart in your soul that you have people in your life who love you and and you love them and you have the company you need when you need it so someone to share your journey with and you know that’s that’s the major difference but you can be alone and not feel lonely that’s for sure and I’m a big music fan so that makes me think of Michael Jackson for a second because one of his most popular songs where you are not alone and so if you’re not alone or if you’re feeling lonely you’re in essence in a spiritual sense you’re you’re exhibiting the fact that you at least intellectually you’re trying to logically feel that you’re not a part of the universe meaning you’re separate from the universe so I guess I would feel lonely if you are not you know another side of it is to be still and know that I’m God right so if that’s spiritual you’re connecting to higher vibrations versus feeling separated I guess that’s a little story of thing Michael Jackson that’s a really good song you’re not alone and I wanted to throw that in there when just listening people when people listen to this about attracting your fairy to love you are never alone yes you’re never alone yes you’re part of the universe and you never alone and if you do feel alone and lonely that means that you’ve disconnected yourself somehow but once you find that connection you’ll feel the peace of it and the reassurance and the knowing that you not alone so that automatically raises your vibration you’re attracting the resources the people that you need in your life to reinforce that that feeling of not being alone but yeah you’re right and the other side of that is we’ve talked a lot about attracting your fairy tale of right even after Valentine’s Day and that’s usually the beginning and so they’re back to being your 20s 30s 40s but if you have a lifelong partner like you said those relationships continue to change and one of your books is called Sara song talking about your relationship with their grandma where that relationship have changed and that may change with you’re not necessarily your partner but other people’s partner over time I like for you to talk a little bit about Sara’s song what was the drive for and maybe we can take that and plug that into attracting your fairy tale oh yes Sara song is about the special bond get grandchildren share with their grandparents in this case it was from the granddaughter with her grandmother and they lost sharing music and dancing and singing together but as grandma ages that relationship changes so and it’s not necessarily sick or anything but just with aging she start using a cane she’s having a hard time keeping up with the dancing and singing so the relationship changes to where Sara now is trying to get grandma to go back to their routines and their play times but it’s not happening anymore so Sarah’s the one dancing and singing in grandma’s just rocking on a chair and just you know laying in bed but so the relationship changes the Sara’s disappointed of course and she wants to find a way to bring that back so she thinks if she finds the perfect song grandma will will start dancing and singing again which of course doesn’t happen but she has to find a way to keep the tradition life and to keep going even in light of that new relationship and the way she doesn’t you have to you know read the book to find out but yes all relationship all relationships change it’s not possible for them to stay the same and even I’ll give an example with my kids because my oldest one is almost 18 and then the little ones are 10 and 11 and their age difference is 18 months but sometimes my you know oldest one would say something well it’s not fair because he got this and I didn’t get it and I would say to her okay well he also wears diapers would you like me to put one on you too so so it’s there you know it’s not it doesn’t have to be fair because it’s according to his knees and to your needs so you know I don’t I don’t take that I don’t know that excuse it’s not fair yes would you like to drink from a bottle also because it’s not fair you know I wouldn’t force that on you and tell you well it’s not fair so don’t use that excuse the same thing you know the the relationship between our parents with grandparents husband they change and they should change they’re supposed to it’s not a good thing to stay the same at the same level so yeah we grow that way and along those lines is your husband from Bulgaria yes yes you know women they’re perfect I poured out what I was trying to get at was family traditions and you’re saying your kids are different and in 2019 you have more and more relationships where the people may not be from the same tradition so if they’re attracting their fairytale love they may not actually be in that tradition that there and what would you say to those people and how to date those two worlds wouldn’t in essence collide but how could they make a successful relationship there’s always a way and as long as you focus on the positive and the thing but you do appreciate you will attract more of those things and you will see that even your if you’re trying to change your partner I don’t think that would be very successful because you’re doing it out of possibly anger towards something they did or didn’t do and you’re trying to change that and the more you try the more you’re tracking the same behavior and it’s a vicious circle you know and you get even more frustrated Sam you try even more but it doesn’t work once you let go and you focus on the things that you actually like about that partner what you have in common what you’re celebrating together what you what your values are what you’re trying to accomplish together the more you will attract the same kind of behavior and they will they will sense it in you too and their vibration will race to meet you because they only do you think it can happen they can either raise their vibration and meet you at that level or they can fall off your world entirely which which should be a positive thing even if it hurts at the moment because you are actually not wanting someone like that to be in your life so it’s it’s a win-win situation always look at it that way it’s a win-win if it they don’t belong you don’t need them if they do belong there will raise and meet you so that’s that’s how you should look at it no matter how different we are from the same country we grew up in the exact same city we went to the same school and yet we are so different I can’t even begin to tell you how different we are but at the same time we do share the same values the same aspirations sort of in what the big picture thinks you know so that’s the basis and so you can do it we have lots of friends who are from different races different religions and they are married and they have happy marriages so depending on you probably decide to to look at it and focus on what you want me ask rody real quick so I really like the illustrations and Sara song how did you find in Alan um well that was my publishers choice they get to pick the illustrator they did ask on my peanut but mo was was perfect I loved her illustrations in you write even Kirkus love them so it was it was a great match ok my last question one of my favorite illustrations is actually not in the book it’s the illustration from Jada and so Jada had written that letter to you a couple of weeks ago in 2019 my question to you is if it’s 2019 right now let’s say it’s 20 39 and Jada is an adult now it’s just totally forgotten about her childhood and she’s forgotten how to get a fairytale of her and all this what would you say to her in 2039 to kind of reset her to again think like a child and maybe build her or race or vibration so that she can actually attract what you want I would just want to remind her how magical it was you know back when she was a child and she believed in the fairytales and she read the books and she was excited about the story and the characters even though they were fictional they were in her life and her feelings about them was so real that she experienced the joy so I would remind her to to do the same exact thing in her life in her present life as an adult just to keep that excitement about the fairy tale and the fiction in her head until it becomes reality because it will so that’s and even I have another upcoming book about the love of books and reading and how stories and imagination help us navigate through life so I’m also excited about that same thing you you believe in fairytales will help you in your in your reality and your life I love it and you also have outreach to teachers and librarians you do school visits how could people get in touch with you and how could they get access to your existing books and sit on their hands while we wait for your new book to come out yes well my books are available everywhere online and in stores my website is www.antakungfu.com takt me I’ll be happy to visit just going Christians fantastic I did have one last question and I thought about that I didn’t get to ask you since you’re a law of attraction fan with you’ve had we had eleven eleven eleven and then we had you know twenty twelve twelve in from a synchronicity state on the web a lot of people are talking about see 19 – 19 what so happened in two days or are you paying attention to any numerology or as it relates to the full moon that will happen when the stars align on – 19 – 19 I don’t really pay attention to that necessarily because you know your vibration vibration you can always attract what you want it’s not about the exact date so yeah to me it wasn’t yeah I don’t really follow that yeah oh no worries just thought I’d ask and with that we totally enjoyed it you’ve been in tuned to another episode of intrinsic motivation from a homies perspective this is Hamza and I’m David Rosie it was a pleasure let’s be in touch excellent thank you so much yes pleasure absolutely thanks for being with us hey welcome you you [Music] you


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